Get the Book

Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator book
Buy this book now on Amazon!

Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator: Uncommon Love and Life is a new book about intimate relationships that don’t follow the traditional path. The first book in the Off the Escalator series, it’s based on over 1500 responses to a survey where people shared their experiences with unconventional intimacy.

Buy the Kindle ebook for $9.99*
An excellent value, this is the equivalent of a 300-page print book.
(The print edition will be published soon. *Price varies for non-U.S. markets.)

From polyamory and swinging, to asexuality, to pause/play relationships and more, this book offers a diversity of insights, experiences and perspectives on uncommon relationship choices. Whether you’re interested in exploring unconventional relationships or merely want to understand them better, knowing all of your options can help you craft relationships that suit the people in them.

Learn the answers to these questions:

  • What is the Relationship Escalator? An overview of the traditional monogamous, life-entwined  approach, which enjoys overwhelming social recognition and advantages.
  • Why do people step off the Escalator? Sometimes people have relationship needs or goals the Escalator cannot fulfill. Some people can be happy on or off the Escalator, and they enjoy having that choice. And some people stepped off the Escalator by accident.
  • What can unconventional relationships look like? Survey responses indicated five main ways that unconventional relationships might diverge from social norms. Aside from not being monogamous, unconventional intimate relationships might also prioritize individuality, avoid hierarchy, not include sex/romance, or not have the goal of “always and forever.”
  • What are the pros and cons of various types of unconventional relationships? Many people report feeling more love, support and integrity off the Relationship Escalator. Tradeoffs include stigma, the learning curve, and lack of guidance or role models.

Every point in this book is illustrated with compelling quotes from survey participants. This information is first-hand,  drawn from real life. Many additional sources are cited, as well. The book also includes a glossary of special terms.


Download the beginning of this book

Detailed Table of Contents

FEBRUARY ONLY extra preview:

Chapter 13, Going Solo: Autonomy In and Out of Relationships

8 thoughts on “Get the Book

  1. Thanks for a great book! We await the print version so we can add copies to our lending library at The Montana Family Center. The center actively promotes diversity in relationships inclusive of all genders, structures, styles, and definitions Informed consent is one of our primary goals, hence our lending library, growing web site and soon audio an video podcasts (the dedicated volunteers are hard at work).
    Be well, and if you ever wander near Missoula, Montana we’ll set up a public discussion/book promotion for you.

  2. I haven’t read the book yet but listened to a podcast and skimmed through the chapter 13 sampler. Am already forwarding to other people. I love the progressive concepts and viewpoints. Thank you.

    1. Yes, I’ve been working to get it published for Nook and Kobo, and as a direct epub download, but have hit some snags and will be arranging that after I get the print edition out. Nothing is ever easy. But these options will be available. I will announce on the website, email list and facebook page when these and other options are available.

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